I am combining our members blog for insecurities week and living for yourself week. For me, one drives the others. I feel insecure and so I make decisions based on what other people think and not what I think. It’s a cycle. So this week’s homework is meant to help you address the insecurities that are driving you to care what other people think.
I want you to write a letter to yourself reminding yourself that you are good enough. Challenge the insecurities and self-doubt you feel each day. Before you right the letter, picture the person you love most in this world and imagine they were suffering from this self-doubt. What would you say to them? The letter to yourself should be written as if it was a letter to help the person you love most in this world. I chose my daughter. We don’t treat ourselves with the same compassion we do those we love. This letter is meant to change that. What would I say to my daughter if she was talking to herself and letting her insecurities hurt her the way I do? My letter is below.
Sweet girl. You are enough. You are every bit the girl you are meant to be. You are the beautiful makeup of your trials, your success, your failures and your triumphs. You cannot be defined by the moments you may have let someone down. You cannot live a life trying to avoid disappointing others or even yourself. You must live a life that is centered around your intentions. You must live a life where your treatment of others and yourself are the only guiding stars for your self judgement. You must allow yourself to be loved in the darkness and not just the light. You must reach for acceptance when you are hurting and confused not just when you have solved the puzzles of life. You must never again accept a love that ignores the tears as they fall from yours eyes because if others are permitted to ignore your pain, you will continue to ignore your own pain as well. You are not the cause of every difficult interaction in your life. Sweet girl, be self-reflective without being self-punishing. Find the truth of your contributions, accept it and then let it go before your self-analysis eats you alive. You are perfect just the way you are because you are evolving daily. You must know your worth and accept nothing less. You will know how it feels to be loved unconditionally only when you can unconditionally love yourself. You must live for your own passions and not for what others believe you should live for. You must ignore the nagging of doubt brought on by your insecurities and follow your breath. Sleep each night knowing you did your best that day no matter the outcomes achieved. Give yourself a break and never again tell yourself you don’t deserve better. Never justify your sadness by blaming yourself for other people not treating you well. Understand what you deserve, know your worth, talk to yourself the way you would talk to your children and add tax on your net value for any person your trust with holding your heart. Sweet girl, you were made for this storm and you were made to receive the rainbows. Accept the sunshine you deserve and turn your heads toward the clouds whenever you forget that you are enough.